Thirty minutes

“Our valued costumers. The store is about to close in thirty minutes. Please be guided accordingly.”
Despite the overhead warning, I walked aimlessly in the mall. I had time to kill before my boyfriend met with me outside the mall anyway. I glanced at the familiar stalls, my hands swaying beside me. I began to count all the little cracks on the walls, and how many lights flickered. It was surely an old mall, one that stood since I was a kid.
I thought about my life, the way I never seem to get a break. I was stuck in the cliché dead end job, with the same boyfriend since high school. I was soon to turn to quarter of a century year old, and yet I had the enthusiasm of an eighty-year-old woman who saw death coming near.
A small hand slipped through mine, lacing their small fingers with mine. I immediately stopped walking, and looked at the little kid. She smiled at me, her yellow headband almost falling from her head.
“Where’s your mom?” I asked her, crouching down to her little height. She was about three or four, her dimples showing as she smiled again.
“Mommy.”
She pointed at my nose, and repeated saying “Mommy” two more times. She even covered her eyes then said “Mommy” when she uncovered them.
I looked around for anyone looking for a kid, feeling sorry for the mother who lost her little girl. No one seemed to be looking, so I led her to the costumer service counter.
“I think this girl is missing.”
The woman looked over the counter to look at the kid, who only waved at her.
“Ma’am, you had this kid with you when you entered the store.”
My heart immediately froze, as I turned my head toward the kid. It was only then when I noticed how she looked like me.
“You have twenty minutes before the mall closes ma’am. You should slowly make your exit.”
She smiled at the kid once again, before resuming to face her computer.
“Mommy.”
The kid began to pull me, but I was too dumbfounded to move.
Who was this kid?
And why did she look like me?
“Mommy. I pee.”
I let her lead me toward the bathroom. Halfway towards it she made me lift her up, which I robotically did so. She kissed my cheeks, making a cold shiver travel down my body.
“I wove you Mommy.”
She hugged me around my neck, as I got us near the bathroom.
“You have ten minutes before closing time ma’am.”
A saleswoman told me when she saw me going into the bathroom.
“The kid wants to pee. It would just be a moment.”
The saleswoman smiled when the kid began to wave at her as we entered the bathroom. I didn’t know what to do when we got in. I never wanted to be a mother ever since I could remember, so I awkwardly let the kid down to find a stall for her to pee in.
“Mooooommy.” She called out, pointing to one of the stalls.
There were empty stalls around us, and she wanted to use the one with the ‘out of order’ one. I remember it has been out of order for years.
“You use the other ones.” I told her.
She refused, pointing toward the stall again. When I told her no, she began to throw a tantrum.
“Mommy! I pee!”
I gave up and tried to open the stall, which was surprisingly unlocked. I felt the room grow colder when I saw the familiar surroundings of the stall. My hands were shaking when I saw oblong shaped meat like in the middle of the toilet bowl. I remembered the excruciating pain of removing a virus from my uterus. I remembered deciding to do it in a place where I never thought I’d go back again. 
And when I saw the kid climbing on the toilet bowl and waving at me as she turned to blood, I blacked out.

“Valued costumers, the store is closing. Please exit the mall immediately.”
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Boo! Scared yet? Fiction is love! 
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23 Replies to “Thirty minutes”

  1. I can totally relate to this post because my sons always have to use the bathroom when we are at the mall. Also, last time we went to the mall, we lost the keys to my car and got stranded there. They are certainly interesting places.

  2. Unfortunately this story isn't about mall bathrooms. It's about an unborn kid who haunts her mother.

  3. This is actually thrilling – what's next please? haha! I think I have mentioned this time and time again – I totally loooooove how you work on your writings! I can't wait what happens next – there is a second part… right? lol!

  4. Ooooh, creepy story. I know this is fiction, but I bet there really are women out there that have visions of their future children. Maybe not turning to blood at the end, but you know what I mean.

  5. Oh my gosh Le-an, you just gave me the chills. I can see when a woman aborts a child how it could haunt her the rest of her life. It is sad that these things happen but happen they do.

  6. I'm always impressed by your writing. The story is sad. 🙁

  7. I don't know quite what to say. This scared me in all honesty.

  8. You really can make chills run down my spine. Seriously this one had me.

  9. very touching! I loved the way you described the little girl's gestures

  10. Wow, that was pretty creepy, but very well written! I think this is just scratching the surface of something that could easily turn into a book.

  11. such a sad story, I have not ever experienced this but you written it so well.

  12. This is a great read for those of us like myself who enjoy fiction. 🙂

  13. That is one depressing story. An unborn child should have a happy memory not a scary one. I hope when the child is born, the parent will feel only happiness and joy.

  14. Thanks for a nice story that had me thinking a few times… I love the way your write, you really can never anticipate the next step and boy the ending was WOW… totally unexpected… Thanks for sharing

  15. I read the whole thing and I was going to say that It's the unborn child talking to the Mom. You are so good in making stories like this…

  16. You are a very good writer and I understood it was about an unborn child. Very thought provoking.

  17. oh man, you really had me there. First I thought maybe the mom had amnesia or something, then when you said "…saw oblong shaped meat like in the middle of the toilet bowl" I totally freaked out. You are really good at writing.

  18. Wow, very creepy twist at the end! Totally not what I was expecting. I love your writing style!

  19. Wow this is really creepy. So she got rid of the baby and now the baby is back, leading her back to the bathroom where she did the wicked deed? I had to re-read it twice. 🙁

  20. Holy. Crap. I'm speechless. Seriously. Could you stop blowing my mind with your writing please?

  21. Wow, very cool writing. I was on the edge of my seat!

  22. This is a very interesting story! Unborn child haunting her mother. I want to read more!!

  23. This post was a bit upsetting. I'm not really sure what yo say about it. I miss your other stories

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